May 9, 2008 Weekend Challenge
May 9, 2008 | 1 Comment
Sunday is Mother’s Day, and my challenge for you is to reach out to the Mom’s you love. Reach out to all the special women in your life that have made an impact on you.
For me, I am going to do something a little different this year.
This year, I am going to be sending a special ecard. Women for Women International is doing something amazing. When you go to their Mother’s Day homepage, you can read about Elizabeth and her story of triumph, and you can also send a special ecard to your favorite Mom that can help change the life of a Mother who is a survivor of war. On the website they explain it best…
“Your Mother’s Day Donation Makes 3 Women Happy.
You get the gratification of knowing you’re helping a woman survivor of war, the woman you honor feels the special joy of being loved and a woman who lives half a world away gets the tools she needs to build a better life.”
I’m not sure if it can get better than that. So grab your credit card, head on over to Women For Women International’s Mother’s Day page and make three women happy with a click of a button. This challenge, you can’t pass up!
Happy Mother’s Day to all!
Daughters…We Are Our Mothers’ Keepers…
April 24, 2008 | 10 Comments
There’s nothing quite like a festive African party. For an African woman, the preparation of the food is more than a labor of love…it is hard work requiring skillful handcrafting and hours of preparation. It is within this arduous process that my adolescent memories of entertaining linger, mostly because of the women who surround my mother to assist in the cooking.
I vividly remember their arrivals. Some are wearing their “good” clothes…others carry fancy bags brimming with colorful lapas, lace blouses, high heeled shoes and headdresses. Throughout the morning, a chorus of greetings welcomes each new entrant. This intimate gathering of sisters…coming together to do some serious cooking while enjoying the camaraderie of jovial banter, gossip and laughter.
It is here, that we, our mothers’ daughters are embraced by the earthen well of female wisdom. It is within this circle, that these elders model the unique rituals of what it means to be an African woman. Our mothers, aunts, grandmothers and older sisters shed all pretensions…naked womanhood is celebrated full strength, intertwined with wit, shared pain and laughter.
As for the humorous banter There’s lots of that…because as the African saying goes, if you don’t laugh about certain things, you will cry. The laughter bubbles throughout the day, much like the steaming caldrons over the huge outdoor fires.. The savory smells are as enticing to us, the daughters, as the juicy tidbits of gossip that flutter through the air. We avert our eyes, eager to catch every morsel until a disapproving glance warns us to move out of earshot.
At times, we also see the pain of tears being wiped away followed by hugs, supportive murmurs, words of counsel and the wisdom of shared experience. We are not the center of this circle, but we cherish our place. We know that we are daughters…
To keep one’s mother in African tradition is one of the highest honors that a daughter can give to the one who carried her forth into life. It is to respect the dignity and strength that it takes to survive in an environment where the harshness of the physical surroundings adds tremendous weight to the challenges of simply being female in a world that doesn’t provide a lot of external support.
This is why when I read the story of “A Most Amazing Village”by Liz Brody in the latest Oprah Magazine publication(May 2008), I instinctively understand the story of young Senteyo Lenaiyasa…a 14 year old member of an all female community in a village called Umoja, located in a remote part of Kenya. Liz describes the women of Umoja in this way,
“From what I’d heard, this community is making history-a gutsy anomaly of female bonding in a world where women are still treated as livestock.”
Senteyo’s story is a heart breaking account of a hard childhood with a poor widowed mother. Her uncles marry her off for a few cows around the age of 13. Prior to this she is circumcised…a gruesome practise which scars a womans genital organs presumably to control her desire for sexual pleasure. Many women die from the procedure which is often performed with rusty blades.
Senteyo ran for her life. It is in this small village of brave women that she finds refuge and a place to heal and begins to build a life. It’s not a life without challenges. But these ladies have a strength which has been refined through the furnace of deep affliction and abuse. A passion nurtured by the deep communal waters of female support.
I am struck by the juxtaposition of another story taking place within the plains of Texas which is riveting the attention of our nation. It is also a story about a community, but what grips my attention is the women. These Women in identical dresses with long hair. These Women with sad eyes and evasive mannerisms. Women who have lost the rights to their children because the State of Texas indicates they failed to protect their daughters.
The final outcome of this story will play out in the days and months to come, but the question remains this for me. Who was keeping these young daughters? How did they learn to what it means to become a woman? Where did things go so terribly wrong that their mothers chose to protect abusive men rather than their daughters. When the time comes…who will show these daughters how to become their Mothers’ Keepers?
Somewhere, we have lost our way. Somehow we have accepted the meager offerings of privacy as full payment for the loss of community. We have lost our understanding of what it means to have the right to be a full woman.
Men cannot give this to women…only mothers can. And only daughters can keep this sacred rite and continue its’ tradition. When we link arms in loving support around wounded womanhood, we become bearers of an eternal flame. When we support other women who are suffering injustice, we learn that we are not alone. In this way, we honor the sisterhood and we become our Mothers’ Keeper.
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The Project O Bracelet is transforming lives like Senteyo’s by providing jobs which allow women to provide for themselves and their families. To learn more about this project you can visit the village of Umoja directly via…http://www.madre.org/.
Picture courtesy of OziAfricana’s photostream on flikr.com
On Affluenza & Other Symptomatic Material Moments…
March 31, 2008 | 5 Comments
This weekend, I went to the store to buy one book and left with another. Leaving a store with an item that I didn’t enter with the intention to purchase is not the “news story” here. If you’re anything like me, it probably happens to you all the time.
However, it’s the subject of one particular book which has me sheepishly explaining the incredibly obvious contradiction of the two books that I’m about to pay for at the check-out counter. Their titles are…”The Middle-Class Millionaire; The Rise of the New Rich and How They Are Changing America….and the book that somehow gripped me while browsing through the aisles. It is entitled…”Affluenza; The All-Consuming Epidemic.”
The clerk glances at the two titles and then struck by the polar opposite nature of the purchases, picks them up and examines them more thoroughly. Finally he offers this explanation…”Well, M’am…when you’re rich, you’ll know how to avoid Affluenza.” I nod in muted agreement…doubtful.
However, it is this book…the one I didn’t go to the store to buy that consumes my attention throughout the weekend. Affluenza is defined as:
n. a painful, contagious, socially transmitted condition of overload, debt, anxiety, and waste resulting from the dogged pursuit of more.
1. The bloated, sluggish and unfulfilled feeling that results from efforts to keep up with the Jones.
2. An epidemic of stress, overwork, waste and indebtedness caused by the dogged pursuit of the American Dream.
The book Affluenza is like a spirited conversation. An engaging and convicting look at what has transpired to us (and within us ) as we have doggedly pursued the American Dream…of more, more & more. It’s a wake-up call that brings into sharp focus the manner in which excessive consumerism has created a nightmare in which most of us are still sleepwalking.
Written with a wry wit and clear eyed analysis, this book offers a comprehensive diagnosis: Starting with Shopping Fever, the Rash of Bankruptcies, Swollen Expectation, Chronic Congestion, the Stress of Excess, Community Chills, An Ache for Meaning, Resource Exhaustion, Industrial Diarrhea and eventually Dissatisfaction Guaranteed, it gently prods us to see our over-drive efforts for improvement at all costs in an entirely new light.
I admit to being mesmerized and at the same time somewhat disheartened. Perhaps it is the sinking realization that one can be on the right path, yet in so many ways miss the reason for the journey in the first place. It is a sobering thing to recognize that the clothes we wear may have cost someone their life. Or that the fruit that is available all year round in the grocery store is cheap and plentiful because of exploitative labor.
As a real estate agent, our growing data-bank of millions of homes which remain unsold and are in foreclosure or shortsale remind us that this disease plays for keeps….Affluenza has real implications and disastrous results if left unchecked. It is literally destroying the financial welfare of millions of Americans even as it consumes their savings and now their personal homes.
But, the book is not a treatise on hopelessness. It seems that many of us are “waking up” to the fact that our priorities are out of whack. We’ve been focusing on the wrong things. In fact, things in and of themselves do not have the ability to provide meaning.
Many “rat-race” refugees are seeking refuge through a different route in life. An empowered path which starts by acknowledging that we’ve been living with a skewed framework of values. A path which seeks restoration within and revitalization in relationship without. An understanding which knows that when I am my brother’s keeper, I have not only gained a brother…I have indeed found myself again.
If you’d like to explore this condition further, check out this site where you can diagnosis, understand and find some proven methods to combat the disease. It’s guaranteed to change your perspective!
To Learn more about the Story of Stuff, click on the link or on the picture. It’s an incredible story!
Picture is courtesy of: debaird’s photostream
A Small Price to Make a Big Difference
March 26, 2008 | Leave a Comment
I remember when I was a little girl the Avon lady coming to my parents door to try and sell my mother Avon products. As always, my mom would shoo her away. My mom would always tell her that “We don’t have any extra money for that stuff”
or “You don’t need that stuff to look beautiful.” I remember laughing as she would shut the door.
So, I stumbled upon Avon the other day and found a wonderful product that they are selling. This key chain features a silvertone metal charm and rubberized plastic strap. The cost is only $5.00. Yes, only $5.00 with 100% of the net proceeds being donated to support Speak Out Against Domestic Violence. This is a great and easy way to help out. You can go to Avon now to buy your own bracelet.
They also have The Women’s Empowerment Bracelet for only $3.00. You can read about it here.
Everyone is always looking for little ways to help out. Imagine the feeling every time you pick up your key-chain. A feeling that only you can experience by participating. You will always be reminded that you did a part in the Stop to domestic violence. Not only do I thank you, but all of the victims of Domestic Violence thank you. Every little bit helps. Remember, this is a small price to pay to help rid the world of this horrible crime
Show your support, show unity, show off your key-chain.
(Hallmark)Red Introduces The Mali Mud Bag
March 17, 2008 | 1 Comment
I just love this idea. For me, there is nothing better in this world than empowering women. And Hallmark and (Product)Red have done just that. The Mali Bag is described as
Bogolan (or mud cloth), a traditional fabric art form, is handmade by artisans in Mali, West Africa. The cloth is hand woven into strips from 100% unbleached Malian cotton, hand-tinted using clay from the Niger River and then laid out in the hot West African sun. This is the first export to use Mali’s African Growth and Opportunities Act textile visa. Each bag is handmade, and may have slight imperfections. Hand wash only. Includes a free full-sized Hallmark greeting card, with your personal message.
There are three bags available and it’s as easy as a few clicks to Buy Your Own Mali Bag From (Hallmark)Red. All bags are approximately 10 1/2″H. x 12″W. and are amazingly priced at $19.99.
This first is the Banamba Bag. The pattern “represents a peaceful family or village. It reminds us that through friendship and community, we create harmony by welcoming everyone with hospitality.” The middle one is the KaliKali Bag. This pattern “the roads that may lead us astray, reminding us to pay attention to the paths we follow and to choose a straight or honorable path in life.” The last Bali bag is the Finkumba Bag. The pattern “encourages us to become living crossroads, where people with different perspectives find common ground.”
Here is a great video explaining how the bags are made and how your purchase can help! I hope you take a minute and check out all of the (Hallmark)Red products. I think I’m asking for one of these beautiful bags for Mothers Day. Enjoy!
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